downside

Today was the Federation (united colleges - Anglican, Baptist, Methodist - in Bristol) quiet day. I and a group of other members of the federation spent the day at Downside Abbey. The Abbey is a Benedictine Community of Saint Gregory the Great in Stratton-on-the-Fosse, Radstock, Bath. It is also a school.

We spent the day with Dom Alexander reflecting on church unity. I spend the day reading and meditating on Colossians. I don't really know why I was drawn to the book but it was a very profitable time for me as I thought about how Paul (or the Pauline pretender) encouraged the Colossian church to focus on the headship of Christ and unify around their faith in the gospel. A Church that was in danger of splitting is encouraged to "let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful." Colossians 2.15.

Being one body, one church is very difficult at the moment and it breaks my heart to think that we can not agree enough to unite around this vision. Today was a time for hard thinking about what I would be prepared to give up for the sake of unity. It was a challenge and I am still thinking...

Archbishop delivers ‘Holy Grail’ to Pope

This was the headline from the Yorkpress news today. I was very excited - after all it would be remarkable if, after Indiana Jones et al couldn't find it, the grail had been in York all this time and the Arch- Bishop had decided to hand it over to Rome for verification. Unfortunately it turns out that this holy grail is of the beer variety, brewed in Yorkshire at the Black Sheep brewery. What a laugh the Bishops must have had as the cracked open the crate. The mental image of the moment is forming in my mind as I write.

clerical shirts

I have a real fear of clerical shirts. I am quire concerned that I am going to look blousey. So, today I went to meet a woman who is going to help me to not look like a bloke in puff sleeves. Most of the shirts on the market are just a man's shirt with bust darts. I think this might be a tactical error on my part. I wonder what Gok Wan would make of it all. Anyway, I think I have made a break though with it. I have asked Amanda (the shirt maker) to make a replica of a linen shirt I have loved for years, I bought the black linen and she is making a mock up for a fitting in a couple of weeks. I will keep you posted.

A busy week this week (whenever is it not a busy week?). Tomorrow lectures all day and I am planning to go to hear a cat psychologist speak about how to help your cat with their mental health issues (I really need help with Benny's issues!). Wed is college quiet day - I am off to a monastery. Thursday is a crazy college day which starts at 8.30am and goes on until 10pm. Friday college until 3pm then off to that London to see Count Arthur Strong. So, I really should get a few early nights whilst I can.

prison

Tomorrow I am off to Bristol prison for 2 services at the chapel (one at 9am and the other at 10am) so I have to be up very early to get through the various checks etc. This has been quite a busy weekend - On Friday night we all went over to bath to have a meal with Joe and Harriet who were both celebrating their 18th birthday. We went to a very loud but tasty mexican restuarant. It is extra-ordinary to think that Joe is now 18. He was so happy and all grown up...

My mum has come over to help me with Eva this weekend becuase I hve had to do some work today and tomorrow I am in prison and Mark has gone away to Wales to celebrate Ady's 40th birthday. I am missing out again. Hey ho.

So, I had better get off to bed...early up and I need my wits about me.

banksy

This image is a piece of graffiti by Banksy that has been painted onto a wall at the bottom of Park Street in Bristol, near the cathedral and county courts. The council wanted to remove it but a campaign by local graffiti activists successfully won a battle to keep it unsullied. I have some questions about this decision...who now is responsible for it's maintenance? Is it now a piece of public art? Is it's colour and texture to be preserved in the same way as say the Mona Lisa or the superlambbanana. Now I'm no critic but it seems to me that point of this defiant art is to disorientate and irritate as well as challenge perceptions about art, public and private spaces and ownership of the everyday. To preserve it seems the ultimate futile act and almost deludedly Peter Panesque. If I was Banksy or prepared to climb up a ladder I would be very tempted to spray paint over the image in an attempt to recover some sort of sense of reality. After all isn't it supposed to be temporary, fleeting and timebound?




Liverpool City Council have decided that the infamous house rat on the corner of Berry Street and Duke Street needs to be tidied up. The building is in serious decay so they have decided to half board up the building thus covering the bottom half of the graffiti. This is so the visitors to the city don't get upset about dereliction and decay (as if they haven't seen it before). Many of the unused houses, shops and other buildings have been boarded up and then the boards are painted over and made to look more pleasant. This attempt to Dress Liverpool is one of the most bazaar outworkings of the Capital of Culture plan.

The BBC is running a Banksy Diary which includes some interesting personal stories about the way his work has touched the lives of ordinary people (whatever!!!) and the way to spot a Banksy (as if authetification is the point either).

heaven

I am not sure what heaven is...there are some great biblical hints but it is an illusive place sometimes best understood by it's antithesis.


Contemplating Hell

Contemplating Hell, as I once heard it,
My brother Shelley found it to be a place
Much like the city of London. I,
Who do not live in London, but in Los Angeles,
Find, contemplating Hell, that it
Must be even more like Los Angeles.

Also in Hell,
I do not doubt it, there exist these opulent gardens
With flowers as large as trees, wilting, of course,
Very quickly, if they are not watered with very expensive water. And fruit markets
With great leaps of fruit, which nonetheless

Possess neither scent nor taste. And endless trains of autos,
Lighter than their own shadows, swifter than
Foolish thoughts, shimmering vehicles, in which
Rosy people, coming from nowhere, go nowhere.
And houses, designed for happiness, standing empty,
Even when inhabited.

Even the houses in Hell are not all ugly.
But concern about being thrown into the street
Consumes the inhabitants of the villas no less
Than the inhabitants of the barracks.

Bertolt Brecht

Brentry context are a funny lot

not least because they produced this for the Christmas Trinity College review.

night off

Eva has gone over to stay with Vanessa tonight so we have a night off but we are so tired and don't have much cash so we getting a takeaway and watching a film an TV. I can't believe that we are so rubbish but there you go.

It has been a busy week. I got an essay done, started another one, had planning to do for various services and sermons, done a full week at college, and I now feel that an early night is in order.

You may well have heard that Elise is pregnant! So, I am going to be a step-granny in July - oh joy.

Anyway, because I have the night off and don't have to get up for church too early tomorrow I am off now to have a glass of wine and stare at the telly.

Luis Hardt

I have met some fantastic people via this blog and the latest person to contact me is a woman called Ann who, having read my post about my PhD and the music hall bill I am working on, got in touch with me about a relative of hers who appeared on that bill in 1908. His name was Luis Hardt - the Mighty Atom. She has been kind enough to send me this photo of Luis and some very interesting information about him. She enclosed a contemporary description of his act, which reads:

"Mr Luis Hardt is one of the number of "good little 'uns" who have taken to the boards as professional men. His development, as can be seen from the accompanying photo..., is very handsome and well balanced. He is known to fame as "the Mighty Attom" because of his immense strength in comparison with his bulk and stature. Mr Hardt is a conscientious worker, and exercises daily. He does not believe in alcoholic liquors, but enjoys a good smoke when indulged in, of course, in due moderation"

If anyone else out there has any more information abut Luis Hardt or any other acts on the bill below then please do make a comment here and I will get back to you. Please leave your email address. Thanks



This is the programme for the week commencing Monday afternoon (Monday being the day that the weekly programme changed), April 20th, 1908. Doors opened at 2.30pm and twice nightly 6.50pm and 9pm during the week. On the bill that week were:

1. Overture: ‘Francis the Radical’
2. Ida Katherina: ‘The Dolly Girl’
3. Austins: Comedy Juggling and Dancing
4. Blanche & Powel: In their High Class Drawing Room Entertainment
5. John G. Brandon & Co. In the Famous American Dramatic Sketch – The Girl & the Tough
6. Steel & Laing (Dora & Dulcie): The Meddling Tramp and the Dancing Maid
7. Kenneth & Kane (Sid & Maud) Comedy Duo: ‘Just a Few Words’
8. Capt. Devereaux: Canine Streets of London. A Drama Illustrated by Dogs Only
9. Luis Hardt ‘The Mighty Atom’ and Original Boy Samson in Flights of Imagination – A New and Original Way of Introducing Feats of Strength
10. Neilson Troupe: of Boys and Girls in a Comedy and Dancing Scena entitled ‘An Improvised Rehearsal’
11. Will Walton: Comedian
12. Sarnthaler Troupe: Lady singers and Dancers, in their Mountain Scena ‘ Ten Minutes in the Tyrol
13. ‘Crazy Quilt’ on the Bioscope
14. Tarro Miyake. The Champion Ju Jitsu Wrestler of Japan

phd

I got a letter today from Liverpool University letting me know that my last submission date for my PhD will be March 2009. It seems so odd that having spent all summer writing a draft I now have to wait so long to get it in to them. A twinge of disappointment but to be honest I feel quite relieved as well. Over Christmas I realised that I had taken on to much and it was possible that my brain was going to explode if I kept on trying to put so much in and expect so much to come out in an ordered way. So, I will do a bit at my own pace for a while - just to keep it ticking over - then crack on when I am able to once I am ordained in June. hey ho.

beatle in a box

We are back from Liverpool. It has been an interesting weekend - not without it's tensions but I had a great time. I think next time I need to go on my own and not try to do so much. Trying to juggle Mark and Eva's needs and mine, doing church stuff as well as trying to see everyone is quite hard and it feels that nobody got to do exactly what they wanted and we have come back feeling a bit frustrated and compromised. Having said that we did do so much it is hardly surprising that we are a bit fractious. We got to Bob and Sue's at about 8pm and I had driven most of the way so was tired but buzzing so we tried to find food on Lark Lane. It seems that the combination of the three of us, tiredness and excitement is too much and it ended in a row about food. So, we just fed Eva and got her to bed. Seeing Bob and Sue was great. Bob was very excited about his play and we had a great evening catching up. I spent Friday chilling in the morning, saw Kate who was lunching with Jo and Katie so we had a great chat. Eva went off with Kate to get Maddie from school, I went to see Henry (my new boss and vicar at St Peter's and St John's). We got lots sorted but it was tiring and I didn't leave enough time for a rest before the evening. It is so difficult to rest properly when you re away from home comforts.

I spent 2 hours desperately wanting to get to the Capital of Culture launch event early enough to get a good position to see things but got caught up in other plans and didn't get into town until 7.30pm by which time it was chocker. We had a pretty bad spec but it was nevertheless worth going as being part of such a big crowd is so exciting. I am not sure what I thought of the event itself. It was difficult to make sense of it as we couldn't hear (or see). Seeing Andy Del and Claire Caddick up on the roof with Ringo (who performed in a large perspex container on the roof) was great. I was made up for Andy who considers Ringo to be a hero and the best Beatle. You can see pictures of the event at the offical 08 flicker page.

Did you watch the Culture Show last night? It was an optimistic take on the plans for the year and a good review of the weekend's events.

After the launch we went to see Matt and Kate to find out how Eva was getting on with Maddie - they were having a great time so they had a sleep over and we stayed and chatted for a while until I fell asleep on the sofa and knew it was time to go home. After a good breakfast in Greendays with Kate, Andrea and Andy on Saturday we went into town quite early to have a stomp about and walk from Bold Street to the Dock. There is still so much work to be done in town to get it all spick and span. I am not sure it will be done this year. It was great to wonder about get some bits and bobs and just enjoy being in the city. We eventually made it to the Tate to see the Turner Prize exhibition. I was quite impressed by it, not least for the diversity and depth of the work. Eva loved it and had loads to say about what was going on. She and Andrea had a great time analyzing the work and commenting on it.

We had a little rest before going to see Bob's play at the Unity - if you get a chance to go and see it. The company is called Big Wow - on this week and then probably reprising for Edinburgh. Then I stayed up too late chatting with Chris, Bob, Sue, Andrea and Mark.

Got up for church - Eva and I managed to get it together to go to Christ Church on Linnet Lane (my sending church). It was great to see everyone again and catch up. It seems such a long time since I was there and it as great to see so many new faces as well as hear from old friends. The congregation is getting bigger, it seems like so many positive things have happened.

By the time I got back to Bob and Sue's I was ready to go home - the whole weekend had exhausted me and I felt emotionally pulled in two as I want to make the most of being at Trinity and finishing off work etc but I also just want to get to Liverpool and start my job. The tension I was feeling about my 'old' Liverpool life and the potential for the 'new' one was very hard for me and I found it almost impossible to get things in perspective as we left. We had lunch at Andrea's, which was very kind of her, but I was distracted, tired and to be honest just wanted to switch off and disappear. The journey back was tempestuous as Mark and I fell out over pop music, food and driving. I guess that is how things go sometimes feelings are so overwhelming that they spill out and can be counter to what really should be happening. We should be excited about the future but instead we are fighting against it and trying to make it far more threatening that it probably is.

After a weird night's sleep dreaming about Beatles in a box, big crowds, people shouting to me from far away and being very very small (Freud would have field day with my dreams) I have woken up with the task of writing an essay. It is Mark's birthday so a cake will be made and we will probably be friends again by tea-time.

off to liverpool

I am off to Liverpool very soon. I have to pack for everyone, make sandwiches, have a rest and get eva from school and mark from work then we will be off...ETA 8pm. Staying at Bob and Sue's which will be great though Bob is busy as he has a show on at the Unity theatre. We are seeing the show on Saturday night, Friday we are visiting the new parish, Eva's school and the shops, in the evening we are going to the People's Opening of the Capital of Culture. But it is going to be wet and horrid so I am sure we won't hang about. Sunday we will go to church then set off back to Bristol. Hopefully we will catch up with as many people as possible but there never seems enough time to settle. hey ho...we'll be back forever in a few months (5!!!)

pop music

The BBC has a series of programs running at the moment on pop music called Pop! What is it Good For? Obviously for pop fans and scholars it is a feast of loveliness which is the perfect antidote to the post-Christmas lull. Last night I watched Paul Morley speak to popticians about some pop songs of his choice. He looked st the way these songs reflect something of the concerns of the artists, the impact they had on culture and the way they draw on and develop a pop music cannon. The BBC website writes:

At 50 years of age, Morley is just about as old as pop music itself and in this film he argues that pop has played a central role in the culture of the nation over the past half century. In the post-empire era, pop music has helped give the world a sense of Britain and Britain a sense of itself.

I know I am a complete sucker for pop music and I love it so much it sometimes hurts but I got quite emotional about the way Morley drew out the lyrical content of The Smiths This Charming Man, the iconic shifts of the female image in Madonna's Like a Prayer, and the simplistic complexity of Kylie's Can't get you out of my Head. I think pop music is important and to hear Morley interrogate the three minute pop song in such a loving and creative way was both moving and challenging.

With that in mind I will leave you with The Smiths seminal This Charming Man.



This Charming man

A punctured bicycle
On a hillside desolate
Can nature make a man of me yet?

And in this charming car
This charming man

Why pamper life's complexity
When the leather runs smooth
On the passenger seat ?

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"

A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...


A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
Oh, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man ...
Oh, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man ...

A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things


Morrissy is a Genius.

pink limo

As promised some photos of my mum's 70th birthday - with pink limo!
more on facebook...

count arthur strong

Have you heard his radio show? If you haven't you must. You really must. It is very very funny - the next one is on Friday 11 January 2008 11:30-12:00 (Radio 4 FM), the last one is still available to listen to on the playback. I have just bought tickets to see him at the Arts Theatre, London on 1st Feb. It is Mark's birthday treat.

back home from Virginia Water

We came back this afternoon having had a very good time with my Mum. Her 70th went off very well. My brother Howard and his girlfriend Annabel had hired a pink limo (pictures to follow) from Portsmouth (where they live) and arrived at mid-day Sat to take us for a drive. We went to collect Auntie Susan (who was very shy about getting in the ridiculous car - but after a few glasses of pink champagne she was a carefree as the rest of us). Eva couldn't believe it, she actually got to sip Lilt from a champagne glass sat in the back of a pink limo. We drove about quite a while then went to the Rose and Olive Branch pub where 20 of my mum's friends had gathered for a posh pub lunch - the R.O.B does great pies! We had a great time and mum was made up with the cake I made (thanks to Liz for the Nigella recipe). We had another little drive about and drank more pink champagne...so to be honest it didn't matter where we went - but mum wanted to visit a few people who couldn't get out to her party. After a while we drove back to mum's flat and carried on with a smaller party there until the early evening when we finally ended up watching some bad tv and mum fell asleep in her chair. All in all a lovely day. The limo being the star of the show.

Today we were in recovery most of the day so took it easy, had a lovely lunch then headed back to Bristol. Mark went off to Foundation and I have retired to bed. But obviously not to sleep just yet. I have the Church Times to read and chamomile tea to sip. So, I'll be off now.

sicky

I hope I haven't got norovirus! I know I am prone to being a bit dramatic about illness but I feel quite sick. According to the BBC "Doctors estimate that more than 100,000 people a week are catching the bug." Though to be honest I haven't been sick so it is more likely that I am still recovering from Christmas food overdose.

Anyway, we are off to Virginia Water in an hour or so. I might not be able to get to a 'puter for a few days so I will let you know how the 70th birthday celebrations went when I get back.

decorations

I have taken the decorations down - with the help of Elise and Amy we sorted everything out and have returned the tree and Christmas box to the attic. I was supposed to be working on my essay on Romans but having spent the morning reading I lost heart and really wanted to sort some stuff out. I had a long list of the this week:
- get my brother and girlfriend a Christmas pressie
- get my mum's birthday pressie sorted (it is a digital picture frame)
- get a new kettle (the old one is manky and boils very slowly)
- clean the car (done the outside but need to hoover inside)
- recycle (plastic bottles - 2 bin bags full, old toaster)
- fill in forms for Eva's new school
- make my mums birthday cake (I have made Nigella's Guinness cake, yum yum)
- sort out insurance for the washing machine
- decorations down
- read for Romans essay

Anyway, all of this is done. Except the reading isn't complete. I am really not in the mood for reading at all. I think I won't be settled until we get back from my Mum's 70th birthday party - which is on Saturday. We leave for Virginia Water tomorrow straight after school. Elise and Amy are in charge at Loudon Bristol HQ. There are a few pizzas in the freezer to keep them going.

I am feeling a bit sicky. Got a poorly belly. I hope this is sorted by tomorrow as we have a weekend of celebrations to get through. My brother has ordered a pink limo for my Mum on Saturday and we're off to a posh restaurant for lunch etc. Eva and my Mum are very excited. I am hoping Mark is going to cope with all the fuss and having to stay in the strange flat at my Mum's apartment block (we have to stay in a flat - which we call the shed - which only has 2 single beds and a shower room in it. There is no TV and it is usually very cold). I am almost out of celebration fizz and really could do with being a bit more settled in order to do some work. but hey ho...it's not often your mother turns 70! I am sure we will have a great time.

wookey hole

Yesterday Mark, Eva and I went to Wookey Hole. I don't know if you have ever been to Wookey Hole? If you haven't I can recommend the caves but the 'theme park' is quite odd - don't go with a hangover or if you are grumpy. We didn't have hangover but we were grumpy and all irony had been left in Bristol which made the experience a bit tricky. Mark had been given free tickets but if I had spent £38 (the price of a family ticket) I would have been very disappointed.

We went to a circus show which was basic and although the clowns were good was a bit of a sham. The acts felt unrehearsed and lacked lustre. The staging was poor and production values almost non-existent. As I say the clowning and some of the skills acts were good but it felt that they had lost heart. Eva loved it though.

The caves were great, I hadn't been in a cave for years and they are pretty impressive. How they had managed to turn something of such natural beauty into something so ugly amazed me. As you some out of the caves you can no longer marvel at the way the water emerges from the rock face but instead are faced with giant plastic fake dinosaurs and tiny weeny follies. A remarkable decision to make and an example of why the earth should belong to everyone and not to a few bonkers developers with no aesthetic sense out to make money. I could only wonder at how long it would take for nature to take over again when the whole Wookey Hole fallacy falls apart?

perhaps if we hadn't been so grumpy, if we had been there earlier in the day, if we hadn't been taken round most of Somerset to get there we might have come at it from a slightly different perspective but I can't say it was an enjoyable day out. hey ho.

first day of the year

I remember writing a list this time last year of ll the things that had changed in our lives during the year. 2007 was another year of great change, it was also a year of consolidation, renewal and refocus. It hasn't been without some disappointments but on the whole I feel I have shifted from the person who worked as a senior lecturer in a University to a person who is nearly ready to take on ordination. I say nearly ready because there is still a great deal to be done before I finish in June but nevertheless it has been a significant year for moving on and stepping forward. So, here are some of the highlights of 2007:

January saw me dating Charity, morrising with Liz and seeing Bruce Cockburn.

February was washing machine disaster month and the month I found I was allergic to buttons. Mark and I went to Florence for a short-break and I got a bit grumpy about writing essays.

March I got angry with Jerry Falwell, got involved in a Foundation big service - unknowing God and got sucked into facebook.

In April I went on a college Mission and went to Belfast for a wedding.

May and we went to Ema and Steve's wedding, to Southall and Cowbridge and Mark had a crisis of doubt.

June was spent writing my PhD and finishing off Trinity work for the year.

July saw Elise turn 21 us go on a few day trips and a week in a yurt but I was mainly writing and speaking to Sara about my PhD.

In August I sorted out a few things - including my curacy (which I had to keep quiet about for a few weeks) and just kept on writing, apart from a trip to Greenbelt we tried to save money and spend the summer in Bristol.

September saw me realise that I was was not going to be able to spend as much time involved in Foundation anymore - the politics of the group was too stressful and I felt to do it justice I would have to commit more time than I was able to, I wasn't able to do my placement at Foundation nor my solo preaches so I had to find another church community to for my final year. I am still a member of Foundation but can't really commit as much time to being an active member. This has made me very sad and to be honest is the biggest regret of the year. I wish I had been able to make this work, but there you go it wasn't possible. I miss the people a great deal and that time to reflect and look at spirituality differently is missing - I haven't been able to replace it. I hope I will be able to contribute a little more once my preaches and placement if complete but that remains to be seen.
On a happier front I finished a draft of my PhD and started being involved with St Peter's Lawrence Western. I started a new year at Trinity and finally got rid of the Saab. Re:jesus blog won an award and we went to see PJ Harvey.

October I got very tired, I did my first preach and was ill. But I went to Liverpool again and finalised the curacy and let the PhD rest for a few months. The relief was palpable. I could just get on with finishing ordination training and doing my theology degree.

In November I was 40 - enough said!

December has been very busy at college and church as one would expect.

So, it has been an eventful year. Many adventures have been had. I am proud of what we have achieved as a family this year and despite a few disappointments I think we have done very well. I know 2008 will be a challenge and we will experience many new changes and challenges. But I am excited about it all - finishing Trinity, being ordained, moving back to Liverpool, starting a new job etc etc. Bring it on...