Pink and the Indigo Girls

I am writing something on faith and social justice at the moment and am feeling especially irritated by our government influence of US policy. The images in the Sundays of Tony Blair topless sunbathing on a BeeGees estate in the USA has not helped my irritation. I know the man needs a holiday (don't we all) but perhaps he might have chosen his host and location a little more carefully given the current political situation. Anyway, I felt that Mr President and Mr Prime Minister might like to cuddle up and listen to a nice song by some lovely girls...

Saturday Blues

I woke up this morning feeling really out of sorts. I couldn't shake it. I even made a list of all the things that were on my mind - hoping that this would make me realise that none of them were that bad. None of them are. I just feel that all together I am a bit out of sorts. Anyway, apart from giving them to God (which I did - symbolically I wrote my depressing list of the envelope my Church Times had come in yesterday and popped in my bible). There isn't much that can be done to magically resolve them. There are practical things that I can do to move some of the things on but most just need time. When there is so much on your mind it is difficult not just to get perspective but also to shake off the feeling of foreboding. Like you have to watch your back. It isn't logical but then these things never are.

I was the first person downstairs (this doesn't happen very often...I tend to stay in bed until the last possible moment) and turned on the telly. The image of Saddam Hussein being led to the gallows and having the noose tied round his neck was incredibly disturbing. His barbarism is not in doubt but how does this additional barbaric act solve the anything?

Amnesty's statement on the execution is significant. Malcolm Smart, Director of Amnesty International's Middle East and North Africa Programme, said:

"Every accused has a right to a fair trial, whatever the magnitude of the charge against them. This plain fact was routinely ignored through the decades of Saddam Hussain's tyranny. His overthrow opened the opportunity to restore this basic right and, at the same time, to ensure, fairly, accountability for the crimes of the past. It is an opportunity missed, and made worse by the imposition of the death penalty."


Anyway, I have spent the day cleaning and clearing after the Christmas paper tearing and cardboard stacking celebrations. An unbelievable stash of boxes and plastic bottles have also been amassed. I went to the dump and then onto the living hell known locally as Cribbs Causeway . Neither mission did anything to lift my spirits.

The last episode of Robin Hood is on soon...

Jarvis Cocker

This video seems to capture a few of my Christmas events. My car crash was not as dramatic as his...and no glitter ball in my peugot!

good news

It feels like I have been having a bit of a rubbish time with bits and bobs recently. I have definitely been a bit stressed with the amount of things I have managed to break. Well, just in case anyone is following the trail of damage I am leaving behind me and wanting daily updates on broken things I thought I would let you know some GOOD NEWS!

My laptop, once declared dead, has been resurrected and is back with the living! PC Tech has worked a miracle (if anyone in the Bristol area has a similar disaster or just needs some IT help then I will gladly pass his details on to you) - his name is Rob Heavens (oh the wonderful irony - I think he is a human and not an angel but I will ask him when I see him!).

Anyway, on the day that I discover that my 'little bump' may end in the righting off of my mum's beautiful car this is certainly good news.

other news:

• My neck is still very sore!
• Elise has gone back to Liverpool
• My mum has gone back to Virginia Water
• Joe and Harriet have gone back to Bath
• Eva is watching My Neighbour Totoro for the 4th time this Christmas
• We have finally eaten all the Christmas meat
• We have finally started the Christmas cheese
• We have polished off all the Christmas beer and Baileys
  
• I have worn proper clothes (ie not lounge pants) for the first time since I got back from Church on Christmas day!
• I cried because I realised I really had broken my mums car!

Crashed the car

We have had a great Christmas. Visitors = Joe, Elise, Harriet (Joe's girlfriend), Celia (my Mum), Paul (Mark's old friend from Belfast), Andy Del, Annabel (with unborn child - 1 week late), Rupert and Walter. So, it has been very busy. We have nearly eaten all the food and the young people have done a good job of polishing off the booze. A few Christmas arguments.

But, I have managed to CRASH THE CAR! So, this is the 2nd very important material object that I have managed to break in the last 4 weeks (the laptop being the other one). I was going very slowly up to a junction having come off the motorway on the way to Bath. Having got 5 foot away from the car in front my foot slipped off the brake and onto the accelerator. So, I lurched into the BMW ahead of me. No damage to the BMW but I was in the Peugeot 205 my mum had given to me which seems to be mostly made of plastic. So, it crumpled. I was gutted. Elise, Eva and I were ok (though our necks are a bit sore and Elise has the mark of the seat belt on her chest).

I can't actually believe that I could be so foolish. How did I manage to let my foot slip? It is a mystery. Anyway, the damage is quite bad really - mainly because the car is made of plastic. So much of it needs to be relaced. Even a crash at 5mph can cause considerable damage when you hit a BMW. So, it goes into the garage tomorrow - we will know better the prognosis then.

Hey ho. I am knacked now and a bit sore and feeling very foolish. Early night!

Elvis - Blue Christmas

Christmas lights

Musical Christmas Pub

getting ready for Christmas

These two really are like two peas in a pod!

We are slowly gathering for Christmas at Loudon Bristol HQ. Joe has been here and gone back to Bath for a few days - he should be back soon. My mum is coming over by train from Virginia Water tomorrow. Elise is also ariving tomorrow from Liverpool. We are hosting the Foundation winter solstice stomp out to Blaise Castle tomorrow night - a walk in the woods then stories/poems/songs by the fire here at home.

We have at least one additional guest for dinner on Christmas day so it is going to be pretty packed. But I am quite relaxed though (don't know why?). Making plum chutney today - which is going well. It's a bit sticky and vinegary but I needed to room in the freezer so those plums had to be defrosted to make way for red cabbage, stuffing and various other Christmas bits. Feeding up to 10 people daily for a week is going to stretch us in all directions.

Anyway, Mark is working at snapy snaps today so Eva and I have spent the morning stoning plums and watching crap tv. We are off to the One25 Christmas party this afternoon. Ho Ho Ho!

Schism

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

if you have been following the 'debates' on the evangelical covenant on Paul Roberts blog and perhaps seen Dave Walker's previous cartoons on the issue this will make more sense.

Anglican Mainstream issued a further statement yesterday. Only one woman signed up. What a surprise. What a fantastic Christmas pressie for the Baby Jesus. Just what he wanted - a load of Anglicans fighting.

Ulm 1592

Said the Tailor to the Bishop:
Believe me, I can fly.
Watch me while I try.
And he stood with things
That looked like wings
On the great church roof-
That is quite absurd
A wicked, foolish lie,
For man will never fly,
A man is not a bird,
Said the Bishop to the Tailor.

Said the People to the Bishop:
The Tailor is quite dead,
He was a stupid head.
His wings are rumpled
And he lies all crumpled
On the hard church square.

The bells ring out in praise
That man is not a bird
It was a wicked, foolish lie,
Mankind will never fly,
Said the Bishop to the People.


Brecht again

ranting

Some great Christmas ranting going on...
Lindsey Horner - always good for a rant.

Paul Roberts - ranting about covenants.

Dream Blog - Richard - ranting about carols

and this is just a selection from my 'blogs of interest'. Please keep them coming. Get it off your chest before Christmas.

OK GO! Pop music video of the year?

Pop Genius.

Eva being Mary

Eva played Mary (mother of God) in her school carol service yesterday. It was a proud moment for Mark and I. I mean I am the mother of the girl who played the mother of God at her Roman Catholic school nativity carol service in 2006. She was fantastic. She kept up a solemn and holy face throughout. She was a little upset with her Joseph but managed to keep it together and they looked a lovely couple. My favorite characters (apart from Eva as Mary mother of God) were the 3 kings and their camels (the camels were very amusing - they had fancy humps and crazy dancing legs). The costumes were 'authentic' nativity garb and the use of recorders and glockenspiel added a truly festive sound. fantastic.

YIHO is leaving

At Trinity I have the privilege of being in a pastoral group with this fine group of men and women. In the few months I have been part of this group we have lost a few and gained a few. Today we said goodbye to YIHO who is returning to South Korea next week. We will miss him.

all is not lost

The files have been recovered! The laptop is dead but at least my essay is saved. I will get back to were I was yesterday before it all kicked off. More thrilling installments when I am out of the woods (metaphorical 'essay' woods).

laptop water water laptop

There has been an accident.

I reached for my bible - which was on a shelf above to the right of my desk at college. My bible was the biggest book on the shelf and as such was propping the whole lot up. Like dominoes the books fell one by one finally knocking the glass of water off the end...and onto my laptop. I did not move quickly enough to pull out the power lead. I heard a nasty fizz, then smelt a terrible smell of burnt plastic and wet electricity. I feared the worst. My worst fears were true. The whole thing had gone up in smoke along with a 1,500 word essay on global Christianity which I had not backed up for 3 days!

hey ho!

I may well have found a way out of this mess...but tonight I will sleep for tomorrow is another day.

To Hull and Back

In 2007 John Davies is Walking the M62 from Hull to Liverpool. I have done very little walking in my life so this sounds like a. a long way, b. treacherous (the M62 is a mean place even in a saab) c. lonely. But I suspect these are just some of the challenges that John has set himself. It feels like a good old fashioned adventure.

I suspect he is not actually going to walk along the hard shoulder of the M62 (apart from being illegal it would be really quite foolish). I guess as long as he can see the mighty M62 from the path he is walking on it will still count.

Of course this isn't Johns first walk...if you take a look at his site you can see that he has been doing quite a lot of walking - particularly around his parish in West Derby, Liverpool.

Anyway, we are planning our own trip to Liverpool in January (just enough warning for you to get the flags out). We will be in town by Fri 5th January. Staying at Bob and Sue's (to marvel in the beauty of the new kitchen), little Alex is being Baptised on Sun 7th so there wil be a little trip to Southport for that. The full schedule will be announced nearer the time.

Sacred Dodger

I am writing essays and getting ready for Christmas. There are only 2 things on my mind - Jesus and biscuits. xxx

Loving little Alex's tank top

He really is a big boy now. Looking forward to his Christening in early January. Well done Andrew and Gaby. XXX

Universal Declaration of Human Rights

Today is Human Rights Day and as we are all aware so many people live with their human rights violated each day. This is what 'the World' (via the UN) agreed were the rights of all humanity on December 10, 1948:

Article 1.

All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights.They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.

Article 2.

Everyone is entitled to all the rights and freedoms set forth in this Declaration, without distinction of any kind, such as race, colour, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth or other status. Furthermore, no distinction shall be made on the basis of the political, jurisdictional or international status of the country or territory to which a person belongs, whether it be independent, trust, non-self-governing or under any other limitation of sovereignty.

Article 3.

Everyone has the right to life, liberty and security of person.

Article 4.

No one shall be held in slavery or servitude; slavery and the slave trade shall be prohibited in all their forms.

Article 5.

No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.

Article 6.

Everyone has the right to recognition everywhere as a person before the law.

Article 7.

All are equal before the law and are entitled without any discrimination to equal protection of the law. All are entitled to equal protection against any discrimination in violation of this Declaration and against any incitement to such discrimination.

Article 8.

Everyone has the right to an effective remedy by the competent national tribunals for acts violating the fundamental rights granted him by the constitution or by law.


Article 9.

No one shall be subjected to arbitrary arrest, detention or exile.

Article 10.

Everyone is entitled in full equality to a fair and public hearing by an independent and impartial tribunal, in the determination of his rights and obligations and of any criminal charge against him.

Article 11.

(1) Everyone charged with a penal offence has the right to be presumed innocent until proved guilty according to law in a public trial at which he has had all the guarantees necessary for his defence.

(2) No one shall be held guilty of any penal offence on account of any act or omission which did not constitute a penal offence, under national or international law, at the time when it was committed. Nor shall a heavier penalty be imposed than the one that was applicable at the time the penal offence was committed.

Article 12.

No one shall be subjected to arbitrary interference with his privacy, family, home or correspondence, nor to attacks upon his honour and reputation. Everyone has the right to the protection of the law against such interference or attacks.

Article 13.

(1) Everyone has the right to freedom of movement and residence within the borders of each state.

(2) Everyone has the right to leave any country, including his own, and to return to his country.

Article 14.

(1) Everyone has the right to seek and to enjoy in other countries asylum from persecution.

(2) This right may not be invoked in the case of prosecutions genuinely arising from non-political crimes or from acts contrary to the purposes and principles of the United Nations.

Article 15.

(1) Everyone has the right to a nationality.

(2) No one shall be arbitrarily deprived of his nationality nor denied the right to change his nationality.

Article 16.

(1) Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution.

(2) Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses.

(3) The family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the State.

Article 17.

(1) Everyone has the right to own property alone as well as in association with others.

(2) No one shall be arbitrarily deprived of his property.

Article 18.

Everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion; this right includes freedom to change his religion or belief, and freedom, either alone or in community with others and in public or private, to manifest his religion or belief in teaching, practice, worship and observance.

Article 19.

Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers.

Article 20.
(1) Everyone has the right to freedom of peaceful assembly and association.

(2) No one may be compelled to belong to an association.


Article 21.

(1) Everyone has the right to take part in the government of his country, directly or through freely chosen representatives.

(2) Everyone has the right of equal access to public service in his country.

(3) The will of the people shall be the basis of the authority of government; this will shall be expressed in periodic and genuine elections which shall be by universal and equal suffrage and shall be held by secret vote or by equivalent free voting procedures.

Article 22.

Everyone, as a member of society, has the right to social security and is entitled to realization, through national effort and international co-operation and in accordance with the organization and resources of each State, of the economic, social and cultural rights indispensable for his dignity and the free development of his personality.

Article 23.

(1) Everyone has the right to work, to free choice of employment, to just and favourable conditions of work and to protection against unemployment.

(2) Everyone, without any discrimination, has the right to equal pay for equal work.

(3) Everyone who works has the right to just and favourable remuneration ensuring for himself and his family an existence worthy of human dignity, and supplemented, if necessary, by other means of social protection.

(4) Everyone has the right to form and to join trade unions for the protection of his interests.

Article 24.

Everyone has the right to rest and leisure, including reasonable limitation of working hours and periodic holidays with pay.

Article 25.

(1) Everyone has the right to a standard of living adequate for the health and well-being of himself and of his family, including food, clothing, housing and medical care and necessary social services, and the right to security in the event of unemployment, sickness, disability, widowhood, old age or other lack of livelihood in circumstances beyond his control.

(2) Motherhood and childhood are entitled to special care and assistance. All children, whether born in or out of wedlock, shall enjoy the same social protection.

Article 26.

(1) Everyone has the right to education. Education shall be free, at least in the elementary and fundamental stages. Elementary education shall be compulsory. Technical and professional education shall be made generally available and higher education shall be equally accessible to all on the basis of merit.

(2) Education shall be directed to the full development of the human personality and to the strengthening of respect for human rights and fundamental freedoms. It shall promote understanding, tolerance and friendship among all nations, racial or religious groups, and shall further the activities of the United Nations for the maintenance of peace.

(3) Parents have a prior right to choose the kind of education that shall be given to their children.

Article 27.

(1) Everyone has the right freely to participate in the cultural life of the community, to enjoy the arts and to share in scientific advancement and its benefits.

(2) Everyone has the right to the protection of the moral and material interests resulting from any scientific, literary or artistic production of which he is the author.

Article 28.

Everyone is entitled to a social and international order in which the rights and freedoms set forth in this Declaration can be fully realized.

Article 29.

(1) Everyone has duties to the community in which alone the free and full development of his personality is possible.

(2) In the exercise of his rights and freedoms, everyone shall be subject only to such limitations as are determined by law solely for the purpose of securing due recognition and respect for the rights and freedoms of others and of meeting the just requirements of morality, public order and the general welfare in a democratic society.

(3) These rights and freedoms may in no case be exercised contrary to the purposes and principles of the United Nations.

Article 30.

Nothing in this Declaration may be interpreted as implying for any State, group or person any right to engage in any activity or to perform any act aimed at the destruction of any of the rights and freedoms set forth herein.

Human Rights Declaration

This year Amnesty are marking the day with worldwide protests at the ongoing human rights violations in the Sudanese region of Darfur. You may well also have got flyers in your Sunday newspapers about their campaign to stop human trafficking. Please join Amnesty today and/or support Protest4.

Irony = Pinochet dies on Human Rights Day. What a turn up! BBC Pinochet Dead report

On being ill

I have been ill...'womens problems'. It has meant that I haven't been to college and although I am feeling a lot better I am taking quite a lot of painkillers so I am a bit dopey. Hey ho. I thought I was in the clear because, although I spent 2 weeks in the summer in Liverpool women's hospital, I haven't had a symptoms since we moved to Bristol. Anyway, I am going to have a load more tests including a Laparoscopy to see what is going on. Until then I will have some painkillers and try to remember not to overdo things.

Sometimes being ill is a wake up call, a time to take stock. Virginia Woolf referred to illness as "the great confessional". The place where your weakness is exposed and decisions have to be made. It makes you look differently at the world.

Jesus Shops for Sandals

If you feel like joining an on-line cartoon story on the buy nothing site then Jesus shops for sandals will give you a lot of pleasure.

Buy nothing this Christmas

I was looking at the generous website today trying to get inspiration for Christmas living when I found this: Buy Nothing Christmas 06. I am not sure that I am going to fully succeed in my attempts to buy nothing but I do feel inspired to seriously cut down. How on earth have we got ourselves into such a consumer muddle?
I have been reading a lot about Christian counter culture living recently...Christmas is a time to 'put my money where my mouth is' (oh the irony! Stop it hurts).
ps children and step children don't be scared - there will be presents but smaller ones, with less packaging. xxx

The Garden of Love

I went to the Garden of Love,
And saw what I never had seen;
A Chapel was built in the midst,
Where I used to play on the green.

And the gates of this Chapel were shut
And "Thou shalt not," writ over the door;
So I turned to the Garden of Love
That so many sweet flowers bore.

And I saw it was filled with graves,
And tombstones where flowers should be;
And priests in black gowns were walking their rounds,
And binding with briars my joys and desires.

William Blake from Songs of Experience




feeling a bit 'bound with briars'. Not really the priests fault. More the domination of capitalism and the endless Bristol rain.

Tommy Cooper

As you may remember I am busy reading
Tommy Cooper: Always Leave Them Laughing: The Definitive Biography of a Comedy Legend. I am nearly finished. It is a great book for fans, not least because it is written by a fan. Someone who knew TC and obviously loved him, warts and all. Also, it makes you want to watch Tommy Cooper again, study the routines and look at what is actually going on...comedy magic? Magic Comedy? Comedy?

So, I have posted 2 You Tube routines for you to enjoy. The first is 'spoon jar jar spoon' and the other 'bottle glass glass bottle'.

Is he the funniest person who ever lived?

Advent

Advent has started with a melted moment - last night's Foundation service Frozen was a great start to the season. I feel thawed out and ready to greet the King (Jesus not Elvis - obviously).

Eva has a great advent calendar which has bible verses in each of the windows. She has set up a bible next to it with a bookmark in the shape of a cross (all her own work - I think it is the RC influence). She is reading the advent story VERY slowly from Luke - verse by verse. I guess that is the point! Anyway, I thought this Advent Calendar from Electric December, c.o The Watershed, was an interesting secular take on the season.
Hope Advent is a beautiful lead up the Big Day for one and all.

Take That - Back for Good

I am sure everyone was glued to their TV's last night. Not just to see Carol Smiley get knocked out of Strictly but even more importantly to see An Audience with Take That. It was good olde Saturday Night TV - they even had cheer leaders with pom poms. I mean, what else could a girl want from ITV. I am sure Mr Grade will be proud. I am proud. I am proud to be an owner of a TV licence. Anyway, in honour of The That I have posted the Video of Back for Good - my favourite Take That tune. Take it away boys...

Urban Strawbery Lunch

Missing Liverpool. This is the next best thing! New Age Pensioner from Uban Strawberry Lunch . This is for you Simon (because I have just discovered quite what a small world it is) and St Claire (because, despite the fact you have been very mean about my new look, I am hoping that you get to be one of the Lunch).

Halle Barry

On the Critical Attitude

The critical attitude
Strikes many people as unfruitful
That is because they find the state
Impervious to their criticism
But what in this case is an unfruitful attitude
Is merely a feeble attitude. Give criticism arms
And states can be demolished by it.

Canalising a river
Grafting a fruit tree
Educating a person
Transforming a state
These are instances of fruitful criticism
And at the same time instances of art.

Bertolt Brecht

I am struggling with 'fruitful criticism' but sinking into 'feeble attitude'. I wonder if I am missing art?

lizzie : lightbox: Lois

These photos of Lois and Lizzie's text is so beautiful. What a privilege it is to be able to reflect on each other in this way. xxx

lizzie : lightbox: Lois

New Hair

Well, actually it is old hair newly styled. Charity and I played hairdressers again on Monday and this was the result. It was an attempt to deal with the 2 weeks of being a ginger that had preceded. The original plan was to do more colouring and to add a red layer to the hair do. However, in order to remove the afore mentioned 'ginger do' we had to leave the peroxide on for a long time. Too long. My head was very sore. So, we decided it was probably best to not take the further step of going rock-star red. I myself am pleased with the result. Hope you like it too.

ps I am not gingerphobic it was just that it isn't for me. Some of my best friends are ginger.

Mark Loudon's new webpage

My lovely husband Mark has set up his website. Which, though still a work in progress, is well worth a look at. Some fantastic photos there. Lovely. xxx

Amnesty International - Greetings Cards

Amnesty International launched their
greetings card campaign at the beginning of the month and it runs until 31 Jan 2006.

'It brings people across the world in touch with each other in a simple way - sending a card with a friendly greeting or message of solidarity to someone who is in danger or unjustly imprisoned. These are prisoners of conscience, people under sentence of death, human rights defenders under threat because of their work, and others at risk.

The campaign offers hope and encouragement to the people who receive our cards. It can also help bring about change - the impression their international mail makes on police, prison staff or political authorities can help keep them safe.'
from the Amnesty International publicity for the campaign

Last week was prisions week and in chapel on wed in chapel I wrote some intercessions about prisioners of conscience. As part of this I put together 30 greetings cards for people at Trinity to send. Most seem to have been taken and sent on. My thanks go to Bob Dickinson for drawing my attention to the campaign last year.

Back Street Boys

I know I am getting a bit carried away with google clips but I love this so much. It is pure joy!
xxx

Moral Philosophy and Ethics

I am posting this just as I have been to a Moral Philosophy and Ethics lecture. This helps put a few things into perspective. xxx

Birthday Thanks

I share these with you because we are a strange but lovely family and these illustrate this perfectly!

Anyway, I wanted to report on my birthday. It was a great day. I had 3 parties - one with Mark and Eva; one with my pastoral group; and one at our house with some 'new' friends. All of which were a great blessing. I really am very blessed. I have only lived in this city since August and already I have have some great people to hang out with. It was a special day. Thanks

ps I got an ipod full of excellent toons (from Mark), some lovely perfume (from my Mum), a pingu t-shirt from Claire, chochies, candles, cards and cash. Not that the material things are important to me (much!!!).

I am a little bit of a heretic

Adam and I have have had a little go at this quiz and it turns out that I am a little bit of a heretic. Adam on the other hand has pure doctrine.
I was:
You are Chalcedon compliant. Congratulations, you're not a heretic. You believe that Jesus is truly God and truly man and like us in every respect, apart from sin. Officially approved in 451.
Chalcedon compliant 83%
Monarchianism 67%
Modalism 67%
Socinianism 50%
Pelagianism 33%
Monophysitism 25%
Adoptionist 17%
Arianism 0%
Apollanarian 0%
Docetism 0%
Donatism 0%
Nestorianism 0%
Gnosticism 0%
Albigensianism 0%

Big Bibles

Again I am poncing off Harry Steele. But this is well worth repeating. I bet Harry has a big bible!

Antigone

Emerge from the darkness and go
before us a while
Friendly one, with the light step
Of total certainty, a terror
To wielders of terror.

You turn your face away. I know
How much you dreaded death, and yet
Even more you dreaded
Life without dignity.

And you would not let the mighty
Get away with it, nor would you
Compromise with the confusers, or ever
Forget dishonour. And over their atrocities
There grew no grass.

More Bertold Brecht Poems


I am back from the foundation 'winter snug' at lee Abbey. Completely trashed. Mark has gone to foundation and I am pondering on the weekend. It has been a hard weekend not least because I traveled over some old paths that I hadn't expected to need again. I also got angry. I felt like Antigone. Or rather I felt like Brecht felt about Antigone (see poem above). There are some things worth getting angry about. It is worth being angry about the sex trade and human-trafficking. But anger is worthless if it renders us impotent.

Si Johnson drew our attention to Protest 4 which is 'a global network of activists, tricksters, cultural creatives, and entrepreneurs, working in collaboration for justice. The first issue we're picking off the 'hit-list' is human-trafficking.' Many of us within Foundation are working, living or spending time with people for whom the effects of abuse and the sex-trade is an everyday reality. I am glad that others are visibly realising that this is an issue to 'pick off the hit-list'. My hope is that a momentum will gather around this campaign.

The danger is we get so caught up in our own feelings about the situation we become immobilised by the sheer horror of it. Watching a film like Lilya 4-Ever overwhelms me. It makes me feel too much. I don't want to feel so much that I can not act. I don't need to be shocked I need to be empowered. Brecht attempted to shift the focus away from the feelings of his audience to the way in which they might be empowered by cultural artefacts to bring about social change. I am not feeling empowered yet...just a bit jaded. hence my return to the epic and to Brecht. Searching for a creative form that doesn't rely on high emotion is a challenge. I wonder if, as Christians, we rely on emotional provocation too much?

Tonight I am tired and tomorrow I am going to spend in solitude (well as much solitude as is possible with a small child to play with, a PhD to write and an ethics essay to prepare for). I had expected to come home revived. I had thought that was what I needed. I was caught in a spin when I didn't get what I wanted. My cage has been rattled.

Something for the weekend

I got a parcel from Amazon on Monday containing the Pop Justice and Waterson, Carthy
Holy Heathens and the old Green Man albums. They have kept me amused this week. Pop Justice for its blazing poptastic tunes (their obsession with Girls Aloud is slightly off-putting, but the Killers Mr. Brightside Edit-Jacques Lu Cont's Thin White Duke Mix - is so fab it makes up for it!); Holy Heathens and the old Green Man for welcoming in the festive season with good cheer - I am missing Mumming this year so it is good to at least hear St. George sung!

I am off to Lee Abbey for the weekend with foundation. I am Borrowing Mark's ipod (I haven't got my own - but I have a birthday coming up next Wed, so...) and hoping to chill out and listen to these and other quality tunes. I am also taking Tommy Cooper: Always Leave Them Laughing: The Definitive Biography of a Comedy Legend by John Fisher to read.

Identity revelation - at last I know who I am!

I did this quiz today (as if I have nothing better to do) which featured on the site of Harry Steele.
Though I have subsequently discovered that it was featured on Paul Roberts blog in 2005. Hey ho. Better late than never...I have at last discovered who I am!

Anyway, it seems I am a bit postmodern! (all 86% of me is - though what the other 14% of me is doing I don't know - that in itself is a very important postmodern question). Going to have to do a bit more work on finding out about my Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan side (quite significant side of me actually). Bit of a relief not to be a fundamentalist at all.

They say:
You are Emergent/Postmodern in your theology. You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well. No one knows the whole truth about God, and we have much to learn from each other, and so learning takes place in dialogue. Evangelism should take place in relationships rather than through crusades and altar-calls. People are interested in spirituality and want to ask questions, so the church should help them to do this.

Emergent/Postmodern 86%
Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 71%
Neo orthodox 68%
Classical Liberal 64%
Roman Catholic 61%
Modern Liberal 43%
Charismatic/Pentecostal 39%
Reformed Evangelical 29%
Fundamentalist 0

Jonny Cash God's Gonna Cut You Down

I don't really know what to say about this...

Panda Sneezes

I am know this is too cute to be repeated but hey ho...it made me giggle.

Mark Pictures in the Egg

Just to remind anyone in Liverpool who hasn't yet got to see Mark's (a.k.a. Augean Stabletalk) pictures in the egg cafe they are up until 26th November.

Little Alex

I have just got these from gaby - look at this little fella...he is so cute!

Silence

One DC Artist








Today has been a day of silence at college. The college community was encouraged to spend the day praying around 3 passages:
Revelation 4 and 5
Ephesians 1
John 17

Over the last few weeks I have found college a bit of a struggle: The move down to Bristol has finally hit me and I have really been missing Liverpool; the workload has been difficult to juggle - phd and new theology essays, as well as home life, church, placement and keeping up with new friends; I have found it hard to understand some of the ways that people choose to express their personal spirituality publicly; and significantly my faith has been challenged - which is a blessing but has been exhausting. So, I welcomed the chance to stop and take stock and give it all to God

Spending today reflecting on all this has been rewarding. It was difficult to focus and keep praying for the day (I did slip for 1/2 hour this afternoon when I started emailing people!). It has been ages since I spent time in meditative silence and I felt out of practice (the last time being in last year when I visited Loyola hall In St Helens - Claire Caddick a.k.a St Claire of Toxteth is there at the moment and I am a bit jealous).

Anyway, I have taken great encouragement from Paul's Prayer for the Ephesians:

I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love towards all the saints, and for this reason I do not cease to give thanks for you as I remember you in my prayers. I pray that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you a spirit of wisdom and revelation as you come to know him, so that, with the eyes of your heart enlightened, you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance among the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power for us who believe, according to the working of his great power. God put this power to work in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the age to come. And he has put all things under his feet and has made him the head over all things for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.

Ephesians 1:15 - 23

and post it here as a prayer for all of you.
much love
xxx

being a lert

I have just discovered (via britblog) that you can have a live terror alert on your blog. It doesn't tell you what the 'terror' might be like or what you can do to protect yourself from the 'terror'. It just alerts you to it. I am getting tired of TERROR! The word has vitually no meaning if it is left without expanation and is constantly used to control a population. I want to rally against terror and shove it up the arse of fear!
Anyway, if you want to constantly be reminded of the terror you live under you can click on
UK Terror Alert for constant updates.
Whatever gets you going.

Billy Bragg has signed my book!

I have just realised that my copy of Billy Bragg's book has been signed by the man himself! What a pleasant surprise...

Little England. My lovely home

I have just finished reading Billy Bragg's Progressive Patriot. I wrote my MA thesis on Bily Bragg's music and the way in which he mixed pop and politics (I did my MA in Popular Music Studies and the Institute of Popular Music at the University of Liverpool - which is now supervising my PhD). This thesis focused very much on Billy Bragg's music and the way in which lyrically he mixed his ordinary experiences with the struggles of political living.

What I found facinating in Bragg's book is the way in which he weaves his-story around music and politics, family and notions of nationhood. He deals with the microcosm of people's every day experiences in relation to the the macrocosm of the society within which they exist: His response to seeing the Clash at the Rainbow Theatre, Finsbury Park, 9 May 1977 in relation to the rise of the BNP; the contextualising of his family life with the events recorded in is grandfather's war diary. Bragg emphasises this sense that the individual's story is history and each tale makes up the bigger picture of nationhood history. Perhaps until quite recently the domination of meta-narratives have meant that us 'little peolpe' haven't been able to shape the recorded history of our nation. The rise of 'people's histories' (e.g. the bbc's People's War) might have gone some way to change this. But I wonder how many of us actually feel empowered by our own history and the way in which we relate this to the big story of our nation?

In this book I think Billy Bragg has attempted to reclaim his story and the way in which he relates this to his sense of himself as an Englishman. But his is not a lazy imprint of common notions of patriotism, he is attempting to search for new ways of identifying with nationhood. Not necessaily finding answers but certainly asking some relevant questions.

The purple wheelie bin

This image is reproduced from John Davies site




As Mark is Liverpool, I am missing home and it is nearly Sunday I thought I would reproduce fantastic prayer for the Purple Wheelie Bin by John Davies. When I first read it a few weeks ago in his article written for Third Way I actually cried because I felt so homesick. So here it is:



We give thanks for the purple wheelie bin
Receptacle of all our rubbish,

Carrier-away of our cast-offs, unused goods, undigested foodstuffs, nappies, wrappers, broken electrical items and all the discarded clutter of our cupboards and our lives.

A blessing on those who make it their work to collect these bins together and pour their contents into a waiting lorry,
labouring through soaking rain and stinking heat on behalf of the rest of us wasteful citizens;

A blessing on those who wheel out the bins for their forgetful or frail neighbours, and wheel them in again afterwards;

A blessing on those who brighten up their wheelie bins by painting on them pictures of flowers, favourite TV characters or cartoonish self-portraits.

We give thanks for the purple wheelie bin
Receptacle of all our rubbish.

Give us patience with those who use our wheelie bins as playthings: climbing on them, racing down the road in them like plastic chariots, setting them on fire;

Give us strength to push our full and heavy bins to the roadside, when we are feeling feeble on bin collection morning;

Keep us calm if in a moment of panic we should think our bin has gone, wheeled away up the road or into oblivion.

Help us to forgive those who, years ago now, decided without asking us, that our bins should be purple.

Help us to recycle, and bless those who want to help us to recycle more.

Help us to use less packaging, and bless those who want to sell us things with less packaging on them.

Give us grace to care about our waste and the way it affects our city's space.

We give thanks for the purple wheelie bin
Receptacle of all our rubbish.

Mark has gone to Liverpool

Mark went yesterday and we all miss him. Before he left we had just took delivery of our long awaited Marks and Spencer beds. One double for the spare room and a king size for our bedroom. We have been sleeping on the floor since our arrival in Bristol so the new beds have caused quite a stir. It is amazing: Being off the floor, being comfortable and having new pillows and duvet was the final luxury. Anyway, Mark had to leave this bissful scene to go to Liverpool on his own.

I wanted to go too but thankfully the new bed has made me pleased to be here is Bristol. Bristol is one of the wettest cities I have ever lived in. Mark seems to think this is just an 'unusually wet year' - even if it is I am so fed up with it. It is spoiling my adventure. I wanted southern blue skies and warmth. Not the endless patter of west country raindrops. The rain makes it tricky to stick my hair up and my feet get wet. I know the ducks and farmers like it but I don't.

Anyway, Mark has gone to Liverpool to take photographs of the Liverpool Lantern CO Halloween Parade which I am also sad to be missing. It is a bit of weekend of disappointment really. Good job I have a new bed to retreat to.

I have been writing a chapter for a book about Liverpool popular history all week. My chapter is about music hall (surprise surprise). A new draft is all done and I am trying to send it in an email. But the system can't deal with it and it keeps being sent back. My CD-R burner is knackered so I can't even burn it and send it off. I haven't had be best week really. So much for a relaxing half-term. I might just go back to bed and read my Billy Bragg book.

Fish Poisoning

I accidently ate fish last night and swelled up...it was very unpleasant. I had a swollen tongue and face and couldn't get my rings off my fingers. I had to take quite a lot of antihistimines this morning to get it under control. The evening started so well. Ian had come to Bristol because he is touring with Orson and he wanted to go swimming with Eva. So, having spent the day with us he went back to the Carling Accademy and mark and I decided to go out for dinner then go on to see the band later. Having had a minor disagreement about where to eat (we wanted to go to Wagamama but it was full to birsting) so we settled on a Chinese noodle bar on Park Street. I had satay chicken but it tasted very oyster saucey. I ate it just the same. But felt quite ill. I soldiered on (drank a few pints of Guinness) and having left the gig early (it wasn't really that good) went to a pub and chatted to Ian for a while then came home. When I woke up this morning I had ballooned and was very sick.

What a terrible story!

That apart...we had a great day and it was ace to see Ian. Who was sporting a lovely new tattoo (and I don't really like tattoos) but this one - pictured above - is particularly fine.

Mark is off to Liverpool tomorrow. St Claire of Toxteth is here now and my Mum is coming to look after Eva while Mark is away and I am at college next week. So, it is all go at Loudon Bristol HQ.

Foundation Little Service

I led my first Foundation Little Service last night. I didn't mention to anyone that I had missed Strictly Come Dancing to write my little offering. Hey ho...apparently Spoony was kicked off - I can't believe that is really true...I demand a recount. You see, if I had been watching I would have defo have voted for him. He is (was) my favourite. Georgie needs to go - it makes me feel uncomfortable to watch her 'dance'. Do you know what I am really upset about Spoony going. I feel somehow cheated. Just let it go Ellen (see now I am writing to myself...it is like some sort of madness!)

Anyway, my little service thoughts were focused on Genesis 32:22-30 and this picture of a sculpture by Jacob Epstein 'Jacob and the Angel'. Slightly more thought provoking than Strictly Come Dancing I hope...

Benny in a basket

You may remember that last week Benny placed a dead mouse in my handbag. Well, since then I have had a couple of requests to post a picture of Benny on this site. So, above is 'Benny in a basket'. This is our washing basket where he likes to sleep, here we can also see a pair of my used socks and other dirty washing. Nice.
Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth would it? But don't be fooled by the cute curled up cat - he is a merciless killer of mice.

Wedding Aniversary (nasty cold)

It is our 8th wedding aniversary. This picture was taken just before we got married and was on our wedding invitations (those of you who were there will remember). It was also on the order of service for our wedding blessing which (finally) took place in July this year. Unfortunately I have a nasty cold so have spent the day in bed (alone, sick and snuffly). Mark did bring me breakfast, tea, cake, some books to read, and a big bunch of flowers. He is the best husband in the world. I love my Mark! XXXX

Ship of Fools

St Claire of Toxteth sent me a link to Ship of Fools Godly Gadgets (an old favourite) and I was looking around the site and found this voicemail message that had been left by a member of a congregation. It got me starting to think about what parishioners might call me up about.

Real Live Preacher

I was looking around the blogging world and found the blog of the Real Live Preacher. He has done some live research on communion wafers that might interest some of you. He tries a few out live on his blog...I dare you to watch and not giggle.
ps I have just about got over the mouse incident earlier though the occasional flash back to the small hairy discovery still haunts me. It is like I am never truely going to forget. It is etched on my mind forever. I am now scared to fumble in my bag. (I'm not over it yet am I?)

A Mouse in my Handbag

As you know we have a cat called Benny. He is a ginger tom. He loves his new house and the garden and is partcularly impressed by all the mice that he obviously thinks I have put out in the woods for him to play with. If only he would just play with them. He catches them, tortures them, then bites off their heads. He leaves their little bodies out for us - mainly in the hall. I hate the dead mice and Mark has to sort out them out...Well, this morning when I got into college I fumbled in my bag to find my phone and there was a mouse in there. I wasn't very brave and had to ask a fellow ordinand to help me as I can not bear the stiffness of the little bodies and the horrid long tails. I am so weak and feeble. I will remember to hang my bag up on te banisters from now on.

Sister Wendy Musical

This is one of the most 'out there' creative ideas I have encountered for quite some time so I have to share it with you. Laura Baxter sent me this link to the Sister Wendy Musical project. Their publicity reads:

Postcards from God is a vibrant and exciting new musical portrait of renowned 'art nun' Sister Wendy Beckett. With her homespun philosophy that "art is meant for everyone", Sister Wendy became a household name in the nineties with her televised tours of the UK, Europe and America. But as the reluctant pop icon swapped her humble mobile home for the caravan of fame, her simple life would never be the same again.

Featuring gospel, pop, rock 'n' roll and rap, Postcards from God's bold new score is composed in styles as various as the artworks depicted in the show. A cast of all-singing, all-dancing nuns bring this poignant parable about the world's only 'nun critic superstar' to life in vivid colour.

The show was originally developed in 2004 - 2005 at BAC with award-winning performance artist Kazuko Hohki and is adapted from Sister Wendy's life and works by Marcus Reeves and Beccy Smith. After successful scratch performances at BAC, the show spawned a spin-off cabaret act 'The Singing Sisters' - a 30-strong nun choir who performed at BAC's Burst and Tilt nights as well as Duckie at The Royal Vauxhall Tavern.

Postcards from God was recently showcased at The Rosemary Branch Theatre in London in April 2006 as part of 'An Evening with Mr. Theatre' along with a rehearsed reading in November 2005 at Maria Assumpta Centre, a convent in Kensington. The show will have it's world premiere at Jermyn Street Theatre in London in January 2007.

Until then, you can have a listen to some songs here on myspace Sister Wendy Musical

If you want to become a funder of this project you can go to bluecaravan blog or Postcards From God

Enjoy!

Baby Alexander is here!

Gaby and Andrew Malcolm have had a lovely big boy called Alexander!
So, congratulations to one and all. xxxx

Methodist on line Labyrinth

I have been interested in Labyrinths for a long time and have used the Labyrinth resources that were first used in St Pauls Cathedral in 2000. At Christ Church, Linnet Lane, Liverpool we developed our own Labyrinth for use in an installation service as part of the 'Seeing is Believing' festival in 2003. Also, at Greenbelt this year there was a Labyrinth set up. So, I thought I might have a go at using this new resource developed by the Methodist Church called Lost In Wonder. I am not realy sure what I think about it just yet but I feel it might be aimed at young people (younger than me) and at first use it didn't get my spiritual juices flowing. But I am going to go back to have other go later. Let me know what you think...

Heresy

I am going to miss the last installment of the Heresy talks this week, because we have the Federation Eucharist at Trinity this evening. Which the time when all the colleges (Baptists, Methodists and Anglicans) get together for communion. So, I will have to follow Heresy on the podcast instead.

Virtual Theology

Michael Howard's son tells how liberal Anglicans have thwarted his ambition

My attention was bought to this story by Dave Walker at the cartoon church. I suspect it was not the liberal anglicans that thwarted his ordination hopes but his inability to 'play nicely with people'. Daily Mail News Story.

Women in the Emerging Church

There has been some discussion about the demographic of the emerging church on Bruce's blog - I am thinking particularly of the stream of comments that included 'Foundation is dominated by white middle-class professionals with post-evangelical baggage, most of whom are male'. This and other comments started a lively debate. So, if you are woman, invloved in the emerging church/alt worship and might be interested in helping with some research into women in the emerging church then perhaps you might want to look at this. The link is on Jonny Baker's blog here at Research into women in the emerging church.

The Internet Brings People Together!

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

At least it beats a stupid pointless arguement in the real world!

'It’s wrong but it’s right'

Lighter Fluid's Street Love (see posting 9/09/2006) is still haunting me (in more ways than one) but it got me thinking about stuff that could be described as 'it's wrong but it's right'. So, in a regular column I shall (for the sake of thinking of any other title) call 'it's wrong but it's right' my first thing is:
Avocado dishes in the shape of half an avocado (preferably glass - as pictured)

Tummy bug!

It has been an eventful week at Loudon Bristol HQ. I started my new course - which was intensive and exhausting. I knew it would be a change of pace but hadn't really accounted for the fact that it would be so full on. I was challenged spiritually, mentally and emotionally last week. I have been used to a cold and sterile learning environment where although opinion is valid one is always seeking an objective 'truth'. It has been hard to adapt to a more subjective reality, adding a spiritual dimension to learning is just a bit freaky at the moment. I am sure I will get the hang of it but even praying before lecturers has been a challenge. Getting up for chapel hasn't been as tricky as I thought it would be but letting chapel thoughts spill out into all college activities has been hard. I didn't realise how much I compartmentalised my life. I really thought I had done a good job de-secularising things – making all things holy. How wrong I was it seems that learning was one thing (at least) that had been set aside. Hey ho.
To add to my exhaustion I have had a nasty tummy bug since Thursday night. Friday was a real struggle and I have been in bed most of the weekend. Freshers tummy bug. At least the food bill has been low (though I have used a lot of loo paper!)

In other news: Mark and Joe have been making a dark room in the big shed - which has kept them busy most of the weekend. Eva went to a school friend’s birthday party on Saturday. We all went to Cotham Church on Sunday morning. We have decided to join the electoral register and stay at Cotham whilst we are here so that Eva has the stability of a home church (she went to junior church and was ok). We are also committing to joining Foundation – which has been ace for Mark and I. So, we are sorted.

Welcome to Trinity weekend

We have had a very hectic weekend that started last Thursday and feels like it is still going. I met with fellow BA students on Thursday and registered on Friday. Then we had a weekend of meeting and greeting, settling in and getting to know the place and people. It was a strange experience going back to being an undergraduate student having been a lecturer for so long. I suddenly had a lot of sympathy for their struggles - particularly making sense of module choosing. I had to have help from three of my new friends and a tutor but still managed to get confused so have to return to my persoanl tutor on Tues with a new form (can you believe it I actually filled it in with a biro not pencil so had to get new forms). I had my hair cut on Wednesday and it was a disaster (Mark says he can't tell the difference - which is supposed to be a comfort but to be honest nearly sent me over the edge) so I coloured it pink which made me feel much worse because then I stood out like a sore thumb. So, there I was in muddle with modules, needing all the help I could get, with a husband that doesn't notice how I look and pink hair.

I think I have the right bible and the right prayer book, I think I have appropriate pens and pencils (I have got a pencil now!), I bought a new filing cabinet because mine broke and all my phd files got trapped inside, and I have a stash of ink cartridges for writing in best. But, I don't feel very ready for it at all. It is all very strange and disarming. Everyone is a Christian and I am not used to this many Christians in one place. Everything was unfolding around me - meetings happening, people being kind and supportive. I feel like a great big idiot who can't tick the right boxes and fill in simple forms. I am sure all this insecurity is very normal and in some ways to be expected. It is easy for me to ridicule other people, be ruthless with myself and run and hide from the stuff that is too much to cope with. But, here I have a chance to learn to be a bit more patient with myself, learn from other people (whoever they are) and stop fighting against everything all the time. I can also learn new disciplines - chapel at 8.40am, community prayer, lectures, essays, not farting in my shared office. I am here for a very good reason, and I feel very close to God in it all. I also feel close to Mark and Eva - who have been amazing. How great is that. All those fears, all the 'leaving of Liverpool', escaping Edge Hill, taking a phd to Bristol to finish. They are absolutely still there but by just keep on keeping on we have moved forward and are here starting a new adventure.

Mark and I went to the big Foundation service last night and knew that we have been very blessed, to find a church community that helps makes sense of spiritual experiences is a fantastic thing.

So, I start the new term hoping I can do all my home work, fit in a phd, be nice to my classmates, love my family and be respectful of other people's traditions. Bit of a big prayer list so if anyone can help me out please do.
xxxx

Spiritual Gifts Test

St. Claire of Toxteth sent me the link to this very special test. You can take from it what you want (obviously) and it is quite bizarre but it might just be what you need to find out what spiritual gifts you possess. Do bear in mind, as the author reminds us, the test has not been written by God! And as such 'it should be used as a starting place to begin to discover your Spiritual Gifts, but certainly not as an absolute indicator'.
Do the Spritual Gift Test.
ps It seems (according to the spirtual gift test) that I have pastoral gifts but that I am not a great giver! Hey ho.

Living Generously

The Loudons are trying to live generously.
I signed up for this a while back and thought I might share it with you.
Living Generously is a bunch of people who think that if a lot of us begin to make small changes in the way we live, then together we could create a big change in favour of the planet and its people.

There's about 800 households signed up and each month we get emailed some suggested Generous Actions and the idea is to try and commit to taking on one or two - and then making them part of our everyday life.

Some are easy (takes five minutes to sign up online as an organ donor), some are more of a hassle (switching to an ethical bank, putting a plastic brick in your cistern to save water, starting to shop local and fair trade) and some are more challenging (cutting back on your car use, offsetting your airmiles, improving home energy efficiency).

Every time a Generous member commits to an action, it gets logged on the site and adds to the cumulative effect. For example there's now 296 people who have stopped taking carrier bags from shops, 248 who turn off the tap when cleaning their teeth and 203 who have unplugged their chargers to reduce their emissions.

Anyway, if you feel like you might like to join the generous bunch then do sign up!

missing you!

Whilst sorting through Eva's photos of the Zoo Mark and I came accross a number of photos of people she had snapped over the last year. I have popped them on flickr but I will feature a few here. I realised that we haven't got snapshots of everyone! So, if you have any lovely photies do send them to me and I will put them on this blog.
We are really missing you. xxxx